Sunday, April 22, 2007

I Want My Coke, and I Want It Now.

I have made a startling, yet indisputable observation recently: Chinese people are clearly not as evolved as Americans. While some of you may be appalled that a seemingly innocuous blog has just made the leap into controversial subjects such as racial supremacy and the origins of the universe, I promise you I have proof. Chinese people's mouths have not evolved to the size of that of a (fully evolved) American's. In comparison, their mouths are considerably smaller.

The most obvious downside to this is the speed at which one can consume chemical-flavored sugar water from an aluminum can. While the American, with his highly evolved mouth, can drink at speeds reaching nearly 3oz/sec, the Chinese are still drinking at a paltry 1oz/sec. (Fig. A). That means they have to wait an average of three times as long to consume their favorite beverage!

(Fig. A)

They have no idea what they're missing.


Amanda said...

Heh heh heh heh heh...!

Steve Peppple said...